Sunday, January 10, 2010

Boring title

Tonight's post is half philosophy, half not, so feel free to fast forward to the safe stuff if you please. I just had a question.

How do you guys feel about the notion of things being black and white? Frankly, it just stuns me. Does anyone else live in a gray area? I find it's a helpful place to be. But, so as not to confuse a gray area with being afraid to say what's in your heart, I'm referring to that complicated place of objectivity and subjectivity, of shutting off my default reactions and baser emotions before they run away with me and render me incapable of being understanding.

Something I've been attempting (note I say attempting because I'm no zen master), is to step right out of anything that would bring me pain or anger or anxiety, and look at it from a more third person perspective. This helps me maintain peace of mind.

It might seem odd, like I'm striving for spectator status in my own life, but that's not it at all. I think living in a gray area is probably the most useful tool I've found in repelling negativity. When I'm feeling overwhelmed by any extremes in anger or bitterness or any other type of harmful energy, stepping out of the lower emotions and trying to discern everyone's points of view really helps me to remain grounded. And if anyone can use the help, it's little miss emotional here.

Annoyingly, though, even the above method doesn't always work, because sometimes, no matter how hard you try to understand a behavior or attitude, it all just comes down to blatant disagreement. This is excruciating for me, because I want peace in all things, for all people. I don't like to disagree with anyone, though I'm sure there's a learning experience to be had in it. I don't like to argue or be angry. I avoid both of those things like the plague, but I acknowledge they are not always preventable. Plus, my heart is most often on my sleeve, and I speak from it often, and that alone is risky, so objectivity is GOOD for me, lol. It'll probably save me a lot of trouble.

That rambling aside, I was in the office (nods to day job) recently, and my coworker came out with a unique one liner. I believe it was something like, "Woo wee, I'm tireder than a hot potater cake on water."

Now, none of us can determine what the crack this means, but that doesn't make it any less fascinating. More quotes a la coworker to come, because really, who could make this stuff up?

On a novel note, I keep getting such wonderful messages from people who have read my online fiction and are excited to pick up a copy of Seers of Light when it's released in February. You guys amaze me, you know that? And I don't know if you really fathom how it makes me feel, being that I'm so very small and so very insignificant in the author world, to receive that kind of kindness. Don't think I take it lightly... I don't. And I'm sending you all good vibes. *sends*

Be happy,
Jen

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